the grown-up rules of drinking beer

too bad i don't actually have any readers because today i need some advice. i am wondering if it is unacceptable for me to drink beer before the parent orientation at my kids' new school. unfortunately, the event is scheduled smack in the middle of my happy hours. i will likely only have one beer prior to the orientation, but i hate feeling limited and am wondering if two beers is really going to make an obvious difference. i would hate to be perceived as intoxicated at my first appearance at the new school, but it is a beach school so perhaps most of the parents and teachers will be intoxicated.
oddly enough, the parent-orientation-beer dilemma is not covered by my personal beer rules. the first of which is the general rule of one beer per day (although there appears to be a lot of support for a proposed amendment to make this two per day). there are, however, numerous exceptions to the general rule. they include: it is okay to have additional beer on the weekends (and thursday, because it is a pre-weekend day and my favorite day of the week) and holidays and birthdays (or events involving significant numbers of (more than two) family members). additional beer is also allowed if i have a babysitter or if we are going out - in fact, additional beer is mandatory if we are going out with the kids. additional beer is also acceptable if i have company or am socializing in any way - for instance, a good heart-to-heart phone call with an old friend counts. additional beer is okay on any day that could be called dreary or gloomy - this pertains to weather, but can also pertain to the economy or my personal affairs or those of a close friend.
there are also rules about the time of day when beer-drinking can commence. generally, no surprises here, it's 5 o'clock. however, i have recently relocated from eastern time to the central time zone and am having trouble making the transition. during football season, drinking may begin as early as one hour before an SEC game, unless it's a night game, in which case drinking may begin at 5pm EST (pardon the overuse of caps in this sentence). if you are actually attending a football game, drinking can start as early as 10am, but a lighter, more hydrating beer is recommended - like budweiser or in a pinch, a light beer. another major exception to the time limitations involves boating. if you are boating (but not driving the boat), drinking can occur without limitation. in the summertime, beer drinking may begin as early as 4pm, perhaps slightly earlier if it is really hot outside or if the children are not in a summer camp. these rules are really a work in progress. i must wrap it up now - it's raining here and nearly 5 o'clock.